Free-Floating Hostility

Sunday, October 30, 2005

Truman Capote I am Not

This weekend FFH hosted 34 at our apartment, and also Scott. The boys were very good guests, which is all the more impressive when you take into account the fact that Scott has been highly flatulent even for him and Jeff's in the first flush of romance back in New York (pick your poison). Scott and I did actually come to blows over a game of Monopoly--specifically, over Mediterranean Avenue--but other than that I think it was a highly successful reunion and I wish we had more of them. The problem is, the kind of humor the four of us get into is extremely difficult to redact to a blog posting. Like, right before they left for the airport, they had me laughing to the point of tears by talking via inhalation: Jeff was reciting the opening of Tale of Two Cities, and Scott was repeating "frog ass" at appropriate intervals. That is not a good story.

Here's a dialogue that pretty much translates, but it's the very crudest example of our humor, misrepresenting a wide spectrum from the sophisticated to the scatalogical. It's all I got, though.

Mike: So does Sheryl have a Mac?
Jeff: She does at work.
Mike: Oooooooooo, a mixed marriage.
Scott and Anna: Marriage?
Mike: Shit, I mean, not marriage. I mean, relationship. I mean, maybe someday, I mean--
Anna: Keep talking, Mike, it only gets better.
Mike: What?
Anna: Nothing.
Mike (to the boys): What did she say?
Jeff: She said "keep talking, it only gets better."
Mike: Oh, I see. She was being sharp.
Scott: She is sharp. Sharp. Sharp. Sharp.
Anna: I am sharp. I am a very sharp cookie.
Jeff: You are the sharpest of cookies. You are biscotti.
Scott: You are the sharpest tool in my shed. Now get in my shed.
Anna: That's disgusting.
Mike: Hey!
Scott: You've been sharpening your tool. But it's okay to put it in her shed.
Jeff: Dude, make jokes about your own wife's shed.

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