Free-Floating Hostility

Thursday, March 22, 2007

Announcement, with Coda

So the California AP awards are out, and Michael took 1st Place in Sportswriting. The newspaper, not the writer, gets to keep the actual plaque though. This being Michael's fourth AP award, I am feeling increasingly cheated of the opportunity to line them up on our (nonexistent) mantlepiece and boast. Well, one out of two...

Let me just clear my throat first...


To the sportswriters of California, and their spouses*:

Yeeeeeeeeeah bitches, my husband writes better than you and your bitch spouses! It's not just that he makes the job look good--I know he already had you beat in the style department when he bought his second pair of matching shoes. But I'd like to reiterate that he does his job better than you, and now he's number one in the whole state. What's that you say? Your honey got number two? How lovely for the pair of you bitches. I'm sure you'll be very happy with your new award, which isn't as good as his, and which will mightily fail to impress the judge who gets stuck arbitrating your sordid, squalid divorce.

*I would use a more general term than "spouse" but I've literally never met a gay sportswriter.

2 Comment(s):

  •   Posted by Blogger Unknown at March 22, 2007 11:20 PM | Permanent Link to this Comment
  • Modesty requires me to point out that I won in Division IV, which is all papers below 25,000-circulation. So while I can claim dominion over plenty of sportswriters here in the state, it's not quite all of them.

    On the other hand, ego requires me to say that the AP contest covers both California and Nevada.

  •   Posted by Blogger Rich at March 23, 2007 8:18 AM | Permanent Link to this Comment
  • Congratulations. It's nice to be recognized.

    Hopefully, your sports writing skills & contacts (Billy Beane!) will translate into fantasy baseball success this year. If not, well, I guess shouldn't quit your day job ;).

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I (f---ing, f---ing, f---ing hate) Huckabees

Anna has made her opinion clear on David O. Russell.

Apparently famous Cass Tech graduate Lily Tomlin feels the same way. And, incidentally, David O. Russell also hates Lily Tomlin. Here's a link from defamer to some outtakes from I (Heart) Huckabees. I doubt they'll be online very long, but I'd suggest not listening to them at work unless you can have the sound to yourself. Lots of cursing.

2 Comment(s):

  •   Posted by Blogger Anna at March 22, 2007 11:02 PM | Permanent Link to this Comment
  • The best part of the first clip is Isabelle Huppert in the foreground touching up her hair and makeup while everything goes to hell.

    The best part of the second clip is that when Russell bursts onto the set, the camera follows him, which means some guy is behind the camera making sure none of the obscenity goes out of frame.

  •   Posted by Blogger Jeff'y at March 30, 2007 7:09 PM | Permanent Link to this Comment
  • Yeah, well, this is all I have to say about that.

    Is it okay to link to College Humor? I feel dirty.

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Friday, March 16, 2007

Duke is out

A lot of people are taking pleasure in Duke's eliminated from the NCAA Tournament. This is not surprising. Back when Coach K was beating the UNLVs of the world, it was a guy that does things right toppling the thuggish. Now that Coach K's public image has turned legitimately insufferable, many people root for Duke to fail spectacularly. I'm not necessarily one of them. I actually got to observe Coach K operate at close range. I went to Durham back in November to cover a basketball tournament. It was interesting to watch him operate. He does sometimes come across as smarmy on television. But in press conferences, he simply speaks with the confidence of someone entirely secure in his position. He's a god on the Duke campus and he knows it. I guess I don't really have a problem with that.

Anyway, here's why I was rooting against Duke this year. After leaving Duke's victory over Georgia Southern, I saw some big dude in a bright red shirt walking ahead of me. As I got closer I indentified the bright red shirt as a Manchester United jersey (Wayne Rooney's jersey, in fact). Then I identified the big dude as Duke center Josh McRoberts, who missed a key free throw late in last night's game. And it made perfect sense. Of course someone from Duke would be wearing a Manchester United jersey. The two institutions occupy basically the same role in their sports. My guess, he probably sleeps in Lakers pajamas on New York Yankees sheets.

3 Comment(s):

  •   Posted by Blogger Form at March 16, 2007 10:18 AM | Permanent Link to this Comment
  • I am not sure if I am slightly relieved or slightly insulted that the Lakers were chosen as your NBA example.

  •   Posted by Blogger Michael Mirer at March 16, 2007 10:47 AM | Permanent Link to this Comment
  • Here's a sign of how much things have changed. I sort of wish the Celtics would get good again.

    The teams I hope never have another winning season are: the Miami Heat, Chicago Bulls and Los Angeles Lakers. Hence my choices for the post.

  •   Posted by Blogger Alice at March 16, 2007 1:38 PM | Permanent Link to this Comment
  • I love that last line! Very funny.

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Wednesday, March 14, 2007

In which I Dodge a Potential Social Faux Pas

There has been some shuffling in the sports information office at the school I cover. A woman they hired has since left. Her replacement is, actually, the man she replaced. One of his sports is softball, and he returned at what proved to be tail end of a winning streak. The team split a doubleheader, dropping the first game.

After the first game the new SID said, "Well, now they're going blame me when the losses start coming."

"So you're like The Cooler," I said.

He had never heard of the movie. The film stars William H. Macy, the suddenly totally-fucking-awesome Alec Baldwin and Maria Bello. Macy plays a guy who works in a casino whose job it is to cool down people when they start making money at the tables. He meets Bello and his luck starts to change. The film also includes some extended nude scenes and fairly upsetting violence. I don't know what his feelings are about those things in movies. Suddenly, I fear that I've sent a person with whom I must maintain a working relationship to see a film that could completely offend him. That would be bad.

"It's a little dark," I added.

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Friday, March 02, 2007

Credit for Other People's Work

In these days during which Jeff is so much on all of our minds, we thought you might like to be reminded of some of his early work.

I especially recommend Rough for Actors II: An Act without Vowels, or Thanks for Nothing.

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