Bedside Manner for Boxers

Yesterday April took Quintus to the vet. She was concerned about two bumps that had formed around his hips. The doctor, who April informs me holds a Ph.D. in History from Yale in addition to her D.V.M., examined Quintus and pronounced the bumps benign. "It's nothing serious?" April asked. "No," said the doctor, "I think they're--" she leaned forward and whispered, "Love handles."