Well, at Least I'll Be Free on May 1

The Sacramento Kings very likely cost me two free meals today by trading Chris Webber to Philadelphia and therefore sealing their first-round exit from the playoffs. That's a lot of slices of pizza and days of schmoozing with reporters from bigger papers.

So while my coverage of the NBA is shortened by one round this year, Webber's season will last just as long. Sac with Webber wasn't getting out of the second round. Philly, who will be No. 3 in the East, isn't beating Detroit (or if Shaq stays out for long, Miami). So really this trade does nothing except let all the subtly racist Kings fans gleefully celebrate the elevation of Serb Peja Stojakovic and cracker-ass cracker Brad Miller to the biggest stars on the team.

Your official FFH NBA Finals prediction: Spurs over Pistons in 7 games